If we’re disruptive as kids, we might get an ADHD diagnosis. We may not get the support and adjustments we need from grown ups, but we may get the label and maybe some medication.
However, if we’re good at school, show reasonable engagement, but struggle with emotional regulation or falling asleep at night, teachers and parents may overlook our ADHD.
As adults, the experiences of ADHD become harder to manage alone. We may crave structure, for example, but it’s all on us to build one. Or we may need flexibility, but to others it just looks like inconsistency or being inconsiderate.
Before you can figure out adjustments that work for you, you need to understand the full scope of your experience. Here are some of the lesser known impacts of adult ADHD to help you decide how to manage it in a way that is right for you.
Unexpected or Unusual Presentations of Adult ADHD
Trouble Sleeping
Psychologists estimate that around 75% of children and adults with ADHD have trouble sleeping. (European College of Neuropsychopharmacology) Their brains take time to slow down and “turn off”, delaying how quickly they can fall asleep. They also often don’t reach deep sleep until early morning, making it harder to leave bed.
Subtle Hyperactivity
Twirling hair, picking at their nails, fidgeting with things, and chewing gum are all ways hyperactivity can show in adults. It’s more than just getting bored and tapping your feet while sitting still.
People with ADHD more-so dread the feeling of having no brain activity than they feel “bored” by it. However, hyperactive behaviors can also show in anxiety, so it’s important to get a second opinion from a professional about the reasons behind why you do them.
Social Behavior
One expression of ADHD is inattentive behavior. This can look like interrupting people, zoning out while talking, forgetting the answer to a question you asked five minutes prior, or telling non-linear stories.
You may fast-forward through songs or shows to get to the “good part,” or often change your mind about watching five different movies five minutes into watching each of them.
Executive Dysfunction
People with ADHD struggle with many tasks in the executive function umbrella, such as decision making, planning ahead, prioritizing, and planning. This may look like having trouble finding the drive to finish something they genuinely wanted to start. You may get excited about a particular project or plan with friends, only to become sullenly disinterested 10 minutes into starting.
Home Life
Looking around your home, you may find many unfinished tasks. This can look like buying multiple versions of the same thing before using up the last one. (Novels, notebooks, skincare products, or even food.)
While most people stereotype ADHD as being easily distractible, ADHD comes with its own little superpower: hyper-focus. This rounds out our understanding of ADHD as not a lack of attention, but inconsistent attention.
You may hyper-focus and speed through a video game or artistic project, but feel like a heavy sack of rocks when someone brings up taking out the trash. Doing tiny, mundane tasks feels like overcoming a huge hurdle because they lack the dopamine hit ADHD brains crave.
ADHD in Adult Women
Girls are more likely to be diagnosed with predominantly inattentive type ADHD. Instead of being characterized by hyperactivity—the crown jewel of symptoms teachers look out for—girls are often socialized to avoid causing disruption.
This causes their hyperactivity and impulsivity to exist inside their head, clouding their brain. This makes it hard to remember key details, focus on conversations, make decisions, and self-motivate.
Emotional Dysregulation
Bursts of emotion from both ends of the spectrum show in people with ADHD, like explosive anger or wild excitement. People will describe this as having emotions that are hard to hide and difficult to regulate.
Those with ADHD may also struggle with black-and-white thinking. (“I always do this,” “I’ve seen nothing like that,” or communicating strong, rigid opinions on topics without a lot of reasoning to back them up.)
No matter how you feel about your ADHD, learning more about it may help put things in perspective. There is more knowledge and understanding than ever about how ADHD influences our whole wellbeing, including our mental health, relationships, job satisfaction, and more. Many people find comfort in learning the names of their lifetime of experiences. They finally have a key to the map of their nervous system.
Ready to learn yours? Schedule an appointment with a neurodiversity affirming therapist and together, find the truth.
Therapy for ADHD in Long Beach and California
Prospect Therapy is a queer + trans affirming therapy practice based in Long Beach, CA, with a focus on mental health for first-generation, immigrant, and bicultural communities. We continue to provide online therapy for a variety of mental wellness and relationship concerns to clients throughout the state of California. Learn more about how we bring lived experience to our work with people of all ages in our communities by requesting a consultation below.